Comments, questions, ect. can be posted at my message board at
http://www.b2g5.com/boards/board.cgi?&user=DramaQueenForever

I'm sitting here, listening to depressing songs. Listening, being teary-eyed, and just getting more damn depressed. Sometimes I just feel feel so pathetic you know. And I hate it. I give up. It's useless. I'm not a person who believes in "fate" as it were, (I think we make our own fate) but it just seems like it's not meant to be. At least, that's what I said, and I keep trying to tell myself. But if that's true, why I am sitting here like a sap, just wishing for what could be, when it's pretty fucking obvious it's never going to happen. How do you tell someone you like them when you never see them. How can I get over this, when there hasn't been any closure. That's the problem, I don't know one way or the other. And it's really hard to get over someone when you don't know, if there's even the tiniest bit of a chance, how can I give up. I hate this, and I hate feeling like this. I feel things too deeply, I'm so emotional, and I just feel fucking pathetic, and depressed, and kind of...I don't know...fatalistic in a way. I want to move on, I want to move on so badly. I want to say something, I have to say something. Even though I have this terrible feeling I'm not going to like the answer I get, I NEED to have an answer, any answer. Carpe Diem "seize the day"...so when I'm presented with the chance, I think I have to take it. Because I have to know.