Wednesday, April 28, 2004

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Went to the allergist today, just came from there in fact. Had a scratch test done yet again. For those of you who don't know, that's where they put drops containing common allergens on your arm in rows, then scratch each drop. Then if you get a hive, and depending on the size of the reaction tells you how allergic you are to something. Anyway so I had that done, and now my arm looks and feels like hell, it;s so itchy. I just took benedryl though (which I haven't been able to do for the past 3 days cuz of the scratch test) so hopefully it'll help soon. So I at least have some options now, well more than I did before I went to see the Doctor. So yea.....allergies still suck.

Tuesday, April 27, 2004

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GARAGE GURL - Flirt inna Skirt!
A GARAGE-GURL. Youre into loud music, hot guys and
wild fashions. Youre most at ease when you've
got all your mates around you and you like to
party. Boys are a game and youre always on the
ball because you make sure youre always number
one.
Your virtues: Confidence, fun nature, sociability.
Your flaws: Loudness, jealous tendency, need for
attention..



What kind of girl are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Your: Wondering eyes. Your not quite focused and your quite the day dreamer. Your a bit odd and as many say
Your: Wondering eyes. Your not quite focused and
your quite the day dreamer. Your a bit odd and
as many say "Your head is in the
clouds."


What type of eyes do you have?
brought to you by Quizilla

taf
You're taffy!! You're a clever and kind person,
but you tend to hold grudges. You are not big
on dishing out forgiveness.


Which kind of candy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

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I am such a Huge Flirt. I have realized that yet again. But, it's like second nature...I'm not even always aware of it. Just can't help it. That's not Always a bad thing...is it?

Saturday, April 24, 2004

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Another exam over with. Two down, one left to go. And so unbelievably tired. Wrote the exam on less than three hours sleep, came home, thought about taking a nap, and then got called to babysit. So, I went to babysit already absolutely exhausted. Earned money though, and maybe I'll actually be able to sleep tonight I'm so dead tired. So incredibly tired but waiting for my bagel to toast cuz I'm so hungry. I'm the kind of tired where you just feel grudy (and yes it is a word cuz I say so, I use it, look it up in the dictionary of katie) and icky and blah. SO I'm off to eat my bagel and hopefully get a decent night's sleep for a change. Nighty night.

Thursday, April 22, 2004

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So I feel pretty shitty. And I still hate and despise my allergies...going to the allergist in a week *crosses fingers*. I just woke up from a long nap, cuz I was awake for over 24 hours. Not by choice I might add. I studied for the exam I had today, actually went to bed, and then couldn't sleep because of my allergies. So, I wrote my exam on no sleep...this is the first time I've ever done that. I'm the kind of person who needs sleep, I've never actually pulled an all nighter, so although I didn't stay up all night studying, I was still awake all night...still counts, right? Not a fun thing to do, I don't recommend it. I was starting to go a little insane just when I got up to get ready, before I even wrote the exam. I think I did alright on it though. But yeah, so I git home about 11:30, exhausted already, but thinking maybe I should just stay up and go to bed really early tonight. As time slowly wore on though and I was exhausted I thought okay, I'll just take a little nap, that should get me through. When I finally decided to let myself go to sleep, allergies told me I couldn't lie down. Bout 4:00 I finally fell asleep, woke up around 9, fell back asleep, woke up about 11. Some short nap eh. So I'm pretty wide awake right now at 1am. Which is exactly what I didn't want, how I'm supposed to get up tomorrow and study for my sociology exam on Friday if I can't sleep til really late tonight/early tomorrow. *shakes fist at allergies* So I'm feeling irritated. I feel like I'm complaining a whole lot about my allergies, but if I can't complain in my own blog, where can I. I don't like to say all that much about them, complain to people, cause I don't want people to think I'm like a big whiner. And a lot of people just don't understand how bad my allergies can really be, they act like I'm a wimp, or Like I'm acting like it's way worse than it is, so I've kind of learned not to say all that much about how bad they are and bother me to most people. They just don't understand and give me attitude, or disbelief. SO I'm venting here where no one can give me any lip. That's right. So what else is new...not all that much I guess, just exams, trying to get through them. I can't really think of much else at the moment, I'm kind of all typed out with my venting, so I guess I'll wrap it up for now.

Monday, April 19, 2004

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And on top of all that my allergies have been the worst I've experienced in years.

Okay so I'm more than a little stressed. I'm a lot stressed. And yes now I'm kicking myself for booking an audition during exam time...but it's too late to change it now. I should have started studying way sooner...I kept planning on it, saying tomorrow tomorrow...and what did I do? I started with the exam I'm going to write last. Smart eh. So monday and tuesday are going to be hardcore studyage, cuz my first exam is wednesday, then study more thursday, audition thursday night, and write the next exam on friday. And somewhere in the studyage I will have to take breaks....to work on my monologue...fortunately it's one I've done before so I just have to work on it a little, not actually memorize a whole new piece. Next friday I also have an exam, poetry, fun oh fun, but I have a week after my second exam to prepare for that. I'm just stressed and worried overall, but I can't help that, that's how I'm built. I'm a worrier. I would also like to call to order a meeting of BASTSAT. Although a certain issue about a certain person has been occupying more than it's fair share of my thoughts lately and distracting me more than it has any right to, I've finally come to a decision about it. And once I realized, and made a decision about what I'm going to do, I felt better. Yes I'm still worrying about it but now that I know what I'm going to do, it's in a ceratin sense given me...I guess...a feeling of control somewhat? If you know what I mean...I dunno...I don't know exactly how to explain but now that I've decided I'm going to say something, I feel better. Nervous, worried, excited, yes, but better. And now that I've made a decision, I just have your normal, mundane stuff like exams and auditions to get through...before I put that decision in motion.

Sunday, April 18, 2004

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This week I have an acting class, 2 exams, and an audition. I'm a little stressed.

Thursday, April 15, 2004

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You have no idea how very much I hate and despise my allergies.

Sunday, April 11, 2004

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Happy Easter! YaaaaY! Easter is family time, and I've been doing just that. Hope everyone has an good Easter.

Thursday, April 08, 2004

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Boo to not being able to go to sleep. And to allergies. I hate allergies. They've been so bad already this year, I haven't been able to go to sleep until the wee hours of the morning cuz I feel like crap and have trouble breathing if I lie down. So my whole sleep pattern is messed up. Hence the reason I'm writing this at 4 am. So I'm finally going to the Doctor later today so I can get a referal to an allergist, like I haven't gone through all this before. Well, I haven't been through the allergist experience for a few years, so here's hoping they have some wonderful new medication that I haven't tried yet. Cuz this is seriously messing up my life. I am taking medication way too often, and experiencing side effects, but what else am I supposed to do when my allergies are doing this. I was hoping this was a temporary allergy reaction, but it's been about a week and a half now and it's still going. I'm not very happy with my immune system right now, not happy at all. I want to be asleep right now, but is not really possible. I've been watching a lot of really late night/early morning t.v. this week. Renovation/design shows and cooking shows seem to be particularily popular at this hour. Odd. But when you're looking for something to distract you from thinking about how crudy you feel anything that'll keep your attention will do. So I'm going to go watch some more t.v. and hope I am tired enough I can fall asleep in spite of my allergies, I'll probly update more later this week.

Sunday, April 04, 2004

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Pleasentville is a movie that questions the values in a changing society. It is so deep, so awesome. Totally not what I was expecting but an incredible movie. I am just completely blown away right now. My brain is still working a mile a minute, and I love that this movie has made me think this much. It's totally about challenging perceptions, and restrictions, and the oppression that defined society in the 1950's. It was very much a metephor for the turmoil and fight for freedom of the 50's. About the refusal to acknowledge problems in society, with the idea that if you don't acknowledge them then they don't exist, the whole sugar coating the truth and masking reality to make the world perfect on the surface. It so strongly brought to my mind the race relations and segregation that went on in society and of the race trials of the early 1900's. The courtroom scene near the end particularily reminded me of To Kill A Mockingbird, I found there were a lot of allusions like that in this movie. The idea that if not strictly controlled then society will ultimately result in chaos, kind of seeing it as a fall from eden, from the percieved perfection of the 1950's, instead of as freedom from oppression. It was challenging the idea that being different, that freedom and equality are wrong, they are seen as evil and what will cause this fall from perfection, from eden. The whole theme of colour carried the idea that you can't really live until you stand up for what you believe in. That taking a stand is what makes you realize you're really living. If you plod along at the measured, dictated pace of society you are never going to truly live, never going to experience Life. Taking a stand, fighting for what you belive is truly right is what allows you to see the world in all of its colour and beauty. Pleasentville to me, emphasized that there is no "right" life, what makes life exciting is not knowing what is going to happen. It was such a meaningful movie that to me really caught the revolutionary spirit and the idea of not conforming to society just because you're supposed to. It was such an incredible movie, I loved it, it really made me think. And helped me to better realize and articulate the fact that the more I learn, the more I understand, and the more I Want to learn. If I watched this movie a few years ago I'm sure I would have enjoyed it, still loved it, but I feel like I wouldn't have understood it on the same level as I do now. I want to own this movie. I don't go this over the top about a lot of movies, but this one was so awesome I can't help it. I highly recommend it for anyone, it's a challenging, insighful, incredibly meaningful film and my mind is still chewing it over.

Saturday, April 03, 2004

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The scene, she is done. Finally. It went better than I was expecting it to, and Maria gave me some really positive feedback, both about the scene and myself in general. I'm just glad it's finally done, that the scene is done. It was giving me a major stress. I mean MAJOR stress. And classes are over! YaaaY! It feels so very good. So last night I went to the Baby Oscars, and the party after. I had a blast, it was good times. Then after that party, a bunch of us went to Denny's. Also muchly fun. I'm really really glad I went. I wasn't planning on it, but Leya talked me into it. Thumbs up for Leya. Also had a good oppourtunity to dance, which I haven't had in a while. On an interesting note, I had a few issues with my dress, which actually looked pretty damn good, if I do say so myself...well, other people did too...but it was considerably shorter than the last time I wore it. It looked better, lol, I fill it out better now, but I didn't realize quite how short it was til I sat down in the car and was like ahhh. Posed a few issues but I felt really good in it, so it was worth it. When I feel I look good, it makes me feel good, and I got more than a few compliments which made me feel even better. For example I got told, "that's quite a hot little number you're wearing there" lol. It was just like, schools finally over let loose kind of mood. I had a really great time, and tonight is looking to be good times too. JeN's home so hopefully we are having some kind of get together, more rockin times. So I haven't got a job yet, but I'm planing on updating my resume this week-end, and going to start job hunting next week prolly. It looks like I might end up in daycare again, at least for a couple of monthes anyway. It's not that I don't like working with the kids, cuz I do, I love them, they're so adorable and I find it really rewarding, but it's not so good pay, crappy hours, and having to change diapers that make me not want to go back to it. I'm hoping to get hired on for some kind of day camp in the summer, working with older kids you know. But elementary schools go til June...so I might be in daycare til summertime. But I'm looking forward to chillin with people, partying, in general having a good time, I'm sad that drama class is over, but hopefully I will hang out with many of the people from that class anyways. All I have to worry about is exams, and I don't even start them for a couple of weeks, so I have time to rest and party before them.